Thursday, December 7, 2006

latest at school

ian's school, that is.

sue called me day before yesterday with a couple of horrifying stories related by one of ian's classmate's moms. apparently, this woman has had a difficult time with the school district with her son. i don't know what his diagnosis is.

anyway, he apparently has a history of wandering out of the classroom by either walking out the door or climbing out the window. while ian isn't really strong enough to open the heavy doors of the school, this child is. this mother purchased door buzzers to alert staff when the classroom doors get opened for the school but apparently they're going unused. even an unimpaired five year old wandering around without supervision presents obvious dangers to himself and others, and this school is in the middle of a residential construction zone.

on the most recent occasion, she went up to the school for the turkey day party and found her son in the bathroom curled up in a fetal position on the floor. nobody -- none of the 4 staff members or 4 other parents in the room -- knew how long he'd been there or why he was like that.

for an organization that acts in loco parentis like the school does, this borders on criminally negligent.

this parent has apparently yanked her kid out of class and is going to homeschool him. that sue is horrified enough to even contemplate such a thing means it must be really bad; she's normally gung ho on public schools.

so sue wants to talk to the other parent and then we'll talk about pulling ian. she's wanting to do it at the end of the semester, which is next week.

Thursday, November 30, 2006

from a t shirt

saw this t shirt centuries ago. wrote it down. found it going through shit looking for my lost passport.

celebrate freedom


1984 by george orwell
a farewell to arms by ernest hemingway
the catcher in the rye by j.d. salinger
the color purple by alice walker
flowers for algernon by daniel keyes
gone with the wind by margaret mitchell
of mice and men by john steinbeck
one flew over the cuckoo's nest by ken kesey
ordinary people by judith guest
the adventures of huckleberry finn by mark twain
anne frank: the diary of a young girl by anne frank
the great Gatsby by f. scott fitzgerald
the Martian chronicles by ray bradbury
to kill a mockingbird by harper lee
uncle tom's cabin by harriet beecher stowe

read a banned book

Monday, November 27, 2006

the marriage crap

okay yeah i know that i said i'd post in a bit but around here two weeks really is a bit.

tertia and the gay marriage thing, short and sweet. here's my deal:

in our society we have invested marriage not only with spiritual and religious meaning, but also with legal meaning under civil law. i support your right to be as narrow-minded and exclusionary as you wish in your church, so if you want to marry only 18 year old heterosexuals who don't use birth control and have unprotected sex only in the missionary position through a hole in the sheets and otherwise sleep on separate beds, exclusively for reproduction and never to derive any pleasure from, be my guest. my problem with your attitude begins when you try to impose your narrow-mindedness on society as a whole.

in a civil society where we espouse freedom and try to prohibit discrimination, creating a system where some people can access some civilly-recognized benefits and others can not is inherently unequal and discriminatory. we use marriage to define eligibility for inheritance, custodianship and guardianship, insurance, entitlements (such as social security benefits), community property, and so on. limiting these rights to heterosexual couples is inherently unequal, especially when they are imposed (as they usually are) on some fundamentally religious basis. if you in any way justify your "man + woman = marriage" thing on anything jesus, god, vishna, the parking goddess, the bible, the koran, the good book, the bad book, that other book, or the dude in church, said did wrote or wants, you are using religion as justification for imposition of your view on society. likewise, if you fall back to "that's the way it's always been," you might consider lots of people used to think that enslaving black people to work in cotton fields was a good and justified thing, and some people still do, even though as a society we have generally moved beyond that notion.

in a society where we value freedom of religion, we don't do that. it would seem, then, that in the united states, we don't actually value freedom in the way we say we do. rather, we value the ideal of freedom, but we prefer the implementation of religious bigotry.

there are three solutions to this problem, and i'll leave as an exercise to the one and only reader which might be better:

1) abolish the notion that we are, fundamentally, a society that values freedom of religion. drop the pretense and state clearly and unequivocally that you need to be a jesus freak to live in the united states, and you must accept the bible as the inerrant word of the spook hisself.

2) abolish the notion that civil marriage, with its rights and privileges, is inherently a male-female thing. in this situation, we would extend recognition on an equal legal (although not religious) basis to all couples.

3) abolish the notion that marriage should convey rights and privileges in civil society and law. doing so would require significant changes to laws on marriage, divorce, property rights, guardianship and custodianship rights, insurance, retirement, entitlements, and on and on and on. but in so doing, we would create a system in which your sexuality does not matter. this would move marriage out of the legal/civil and fully into the spiritual sphere.

ian's current deal

patient id:
patient name: ian rainbowjr
date of birth: date

date of service: date



evaluating clinician:
devdoc md

accompanied by:
both parents

consultation: this appointment is a consultative visit. following this visit, a report will be sent to the referring doctor. this patient is seen in consultation at the request of dr. awesome pede, md.

current diagnosis: selective mutisim by patient report, diagnosed at school.

medications:
none

current allergy list: none

chief complaints:
not making progress in ppcd, diagnosis is selective mutism, in fine and gross motoer and speech therapy once per week individually. no other diagnosis. has global development delay as well. has many sensory issues and stereotypies. [sic]

history of presenting problem:
parents first started to worry around 18 months of age; had been in eci for speech delay starting at age 27 months, never made babbling noises, never labeled things.

uses a few words now, has about 100 words but does not ever answer a direct question. ian can count to 20, knows colors and shapes. at school he will not use this knowledge. will go off in a corner with toys and count on his own but wil not use his numbers functionally.

indicates needs by crying, or just does not indicate. he will bring a cup, but this is new. very laid back, will not ask for things. no favorite toys, or tv show. not potty trained, very apathetic. not bothered by dirty diaper. will follow a point, but will not point to indicate or interest, seems to not want to do things.

walked at age 15 months. first words at age 20 months, choo-choo, made sounds only such as zoom, animal sounds. just started saying mama and dada at 4 years. said i love you once at 4 years.

has some pretend play: appears to make up stories; parents observe him talking in single words to his toys, but never tells them what the story is. often names things. likes to line up cars, races them. loves to spin wheel on cars, likes yarn, likes to lay on ground and watch wheels move or watch water run from faucet, or plays with yarn by running it through fingers.

at school likes to play alone, does not interact with kids in music time or in circle time. lays on ground and plays with toys on floor. likes to use yarn or wheels to go to sleep at nap time.

had ct at age 3 at ccmc normal, dr. brainguy ordered was at neurology at ccmc, dr. genetics did testing for fragile x, normal, and had amniocentesis but do not know what was tested but all normal. audiology behavioral audiogram could not test, think they did oae at ccmc, normal. vision seems fine.

can eat with a spoon but often plays with food instead, uses fingers for most of his eating. scribbles with crayon, cannot color in lines, cannot tell where to use different color, cannot hold pencil correctly, cannot draw a circle. no regression in development. no seizures.

regarding his selective (also called elective) mutism, parents report ian never uses normal language in any setting. his language is delayed an atypical in all settings.

past medical history conceived by ivf, g1, normal pregnancy born at 36 wks, induced due to preeclampsia, wt 4-6, in incubator 10 days, on o2 for a few days. amniocentesis normal, mom lost 2 pregnancies, now has 3 yrs old one girl one boy, doing fine.

medical no significant history of medical diseases.
surgical inguinal herniorrhaphy bilaterial.
childhood diseases/illnesses normal childhood diseases
previous immunizations all are current
other hearing normal
academic history: school: bess race elementary school. isd: crowley independent school district. ppcd.
family history: pedi family history: no consanguinity, no other developmental problems. depression runs in family. parents and siblings normal.
social history: not pertinent to the history of present illness.

    review of systems

general: brief review of systems reveals no concerns related to skin, heent, endocrine, pulmonary, cardiac, gi, gu or neurologic symptoms.
all systems reviewed and are normal except as noted. rare ear infections.

physical exam
vital signs
vs-pulse: 102 va vs machine, regular
vs-blood pressure: 119/75 right arm sitting
vs-height: 107.9 cm
vs-weight: 16 kg
head circum: 51cm upper normal range
hearing screening was attempted and this child was unable to cooperate due to lack of understanding.
vision screening was attempted and this child was unable to cooperate due to lack of understanding. audio 2005 at cooks, wnl.
physical exam eyes: no discharge, conjunctive is clear. ent: tympanic membranes clear, no nasal discharge, normal pharynx. mucous membranes moist. neck thyroid: supple neck, no adenopathy. no thyroid enlargement, tenderness, or mass. respiratory: clear to ausultation and percussion. normal respiratory effect. cardiovascular: regular rate and rhythm, no murmur. chest/breast: normal to inspection and palpitation. gastrointestinal: soft, non-tender, without masses. bowel sounds active. lymphatics: no lymphadenopahty. musculoskeletal: no join or bone abnormalities seen, no muscle weakness. skin: no rashes, normal color. neurological: the cranial nerves are intact, no sensory, motor, or cerebellar defects. reflexes are normal. no meningeal findings. genitourinary: normal in appearance, testes are descended bilaterally by history, would not let me palpate.

observations: very little eye contact even on direct request. points to objects on tests with whole hand, rarely looks up at me, often looks out of side eyes. frequently taps face or legs with one or both hands when doing tests. preoccupied with a hand full of yarn bits he brought with him. copies circle and cross but very poor grip on crayon. can name a few items on kbit but can not tell me anything about them, what they are used for, what sounds animal makes, etc.

pediatric testing materials: kauffmann brief intelligence test kbit, matricies ss90, verbal ss80. ppvt iiia peabody picture vocabulary ss87. geselle figures: can draw a simple circle or cross, not a square or triangle. holds pencil awkwardly.

gilliam autisim rating filled out by parents quotient 115, in the average risk of autism. sub scales stereotypes 10, communication 11, social 10, developmental 8. childhood autism rating scale filled out by me with some parent input score is 31, or just above the cutoff for mild autism.

299.00 infantile autism, current or active state
assessment autism plan is as follows: parent support groups such as the families for early autism treatment and the autism society of tarrant county are excellent resources for networking with other parents and increasing knowledge about applied behavior analysts and educational/advocacy issues. the feat organization puts out a newsletter and they provide information and workshops dealing with challenging behavior, helping parents deal with the school issues, etc. an autism packet has been given to parents. i explained the concept of autism to parents; ian seems to be a high functioning autistic, with iq on my screening in the lower half of normal range.

recommend: parents will present our findings and diagnosis to school and see if he can qualify for a classroom specifically for autism, if available. an aba program is often helpful; gave parents a brochure about aba and our program and others in the area. they will ask if aba techniques are available at school.

315.32 receptive language disorder (mixed) does not meet criteria for selective mutism (formerly called elective mutism) in which child talks normally in some settings and not at all in others. ian uses his language skills about equally in all settings, and they are both delayed and deviant (atypical) in all settings, his nonverbal communication is limited as well. hearing has been tested and is normal.

recommend: intense speech therapy as many times a week as possible. referred to ccmc for additional therapy to supplement school program.

315.4 developmental coordination disorder holds pencil, crayon awkwardly, delayed in his drawings. delayed in self care and has sensory issues. recommend occupational therapy as much as possible. referred to ccmc to supplement school program.

lab work: none ordered, he has had considerable already. will have parents sign releases to get work from dr. genetics, brainguy and awesome and review at next visit to see if anything else is indicated. we did discuss risk of recurrence around 5-8% for subsequent pregnancies when one child has autism.

time with patient/parent
total 90 minutes. 40 minutes testing.
return visit: 6 months or prn questions, for a one hour visit.

electronically signed by dr devdoc, md, on date

Friday, October 6, 2006

dildos are illegal in texas!

In case you were unaware of just how fucked up Texas is. With appreciation to feministing.

Wednesday, October 4, 2006

song of the day

bathtub gin
anastasio/goodman
originally published on phish's album lawn boy
performed by dave matthews and friends (including trey anastasio)
december 20, 2003

blue cross arena at the war memorial

primary lyrics only

---
brett is in the bathtub
making soup for the ambassadors
and I am in the hallway
singing to the troubadours

the kings are all lined up
outside the gate
and the autumn bells are ringing
but they'll just have to wait

where is the joker
have you seen him around
with his three coned cap
that he wears like a crown

gave you seen his striped stockings
and heard his sad tale
about the kids under the carpet
and the purple humpbacked whale

here come the ambassadors
they show up one by one
brett is tasting all the soup
to see if it is done

wendy's on the windowsill
waiting to be let in
and we're all in the bathtub
making bathtub gin


the kings storm the hallway
they've climbed up through the gate
they didn't mean to be impolite
but they just couldn't wait

here comes the joker
with his silly grin
he carries a martini
made of bathtub gin

here comes the joker
we all must laugh
cause were all in this together
and we love to take a bath

Wednesday, September 13, 2006

an upgrade

wp 2.04. joy.

Friday, September 8, 2006

where the hell have i been?

jesus.

so i was going to write first about my experience at a paul simon concert.

as always, the concert was excellent, and as always, the crowd was pathetic. simon crowds are passive, just sit there and clap. they don't get up and dance or have a good time. it's sad. of course, in this venue, the concert nazis were out in force actively preventing people from standing up, so that didn't help. this is the second time i've been to an event here where this happened, and i won't go to that venue again.

but of course life got in the way. So I haven't taken the time to update the site the way I should have. But now I have some good shit to talk about.

School: I finished the summer semester with a b in microeconomics, and an a in business law. That brought my GPA up to almost 3.3. The semester went by very quickly, and I'm glad. Two more I don't have to take.

For the fall on taking two classes again. This time I am doing "interdisciplinary process," which is essentially a research course required by my academic department. Well, it is required for new students who joined the program on the 2006 catalog. Since I am on the old catalog it is not required for me, so I am taking it as an elective. Last spring, I took the first of the three "interdisciplinary studies" course is, called "interdisciplinary perspectives." Essentially it introduced what interdisciplinary studies are and a little bit about how to do them. We used a single class topic, global warming, as an exercise in how to do this. (Lots of people thought we were studying global warming, and they totally missed the point. the class was about how to think from multiple perspectives, which is very difficult for some of these people.) I got an a in that class, and enjoyed it a great deal.

This time we are doing suicide terrorism as the class topic. We won't have to do a complete paper basically without instruction at the end of the course, like we did last time. This time we will do it in pieces, and groups, over the course of the semester. Again, I'm having a fantastic time in this course.

the other course I'm taking is the psychology of women. I haven't decided whether or not I like the instructor, but I can tell already I do not like the book. From what I can tell, the book is all about how the differences between men and women are caused by men subjugating women, men abusing women, men objectifying women, societal pressures on women to conform, and so on. So far, it seems to be a man-bashing book.

work: work remains incredibly challenging, and the boss can be difficult at times. I suppose he is like any boss, but that doesn't make it any easier, especially since he is in Australia with all the naked women, and I'm here.

He came to town at the beginning of August and we decided to move our shipping operation to me. So now I have custody of all 9000 copies of our DVD products, and when we get an order in, it is my responsibility to ship them out. We don't get many orders in a week, but we hope to start a retention program using them, so we expect that the volume will increase significantly.

As part of this effort, the boss agreed to rent me in office again. So I rented a place less than 2 miles from my house. Because of the nature of my work, I obviously don't discuss it in public a lot, and I deliberately omitted the fact that I work for Novell website. So I'd been in there three weeks when they handed me an eviction notice for running a sexually oriented business. Never mind, of course, but I don't have any walk-up customers and that as long as they keep the door closed nobody has any idea what I do in there. Nope, not good enough, get the hell out right now. So I packed all my shit, including the 9000 DVDs, put most of it in a mini storage shed, and moved the office of the structure back home. Since I had just gotten into the groove of working at the new office, having to tear it down and move everything back to the house has been a major disruption for me, my work pattern, and my family. It has been extremely frustrating.

So I am trying to run a new office, and this time I'm being more upfront about what I do. I found a great place that will work very well, but it is owned by some big national corporation, and while local management doesn't have any problem with me doing what I do, I asked them to write me a letter saying that they know I run an adult DVD warehouse, and as long as I don't have walk-up traffic and make it a retail shop, it's okay with them. But of course the local people do not have the authority to write that kind of letter, and the people who do have that kind of authority either do not want to write the letter or do not think my business is important enough, so I have been waiting a week to hear from them. I am moving on with my search because I don't have time to waste. fuck them. I offered to prepay six months in advance, and apparently that's not good enough.

dave: I went to see Dave in Dallas, and had a fantastic time. I also bought tickets to the Rolling Stones in El Paso in October, and Dave is the opening band. I expect to have a fantastic time there too.

I have also gotten involved in a fan tape trading site called dreaming tree, a reference to a song title. Dreaming tree, along with other sites like ants marching and etree (which features more than just dave), allow tape and recording traders to reach each other in a logical use of the internet for this sort of stuff. Now instead of trading crappy cassette tapes, you can pick up digital lossless recordings of your favorite shows, sometimes the morning after they happened.

White trash: I've talked before about our occasional white trash weekends. Sue and I had another one tonight and had an absolutely fantastic time. we started the evening with dinner for me at a steakhouse (since she had had spaghetti with the kids and was not hungry, but I slept through dinner), and moved from there to the vodka bottle that she had tucked into her purse. She nursed the bottle while I drove.

And we wound up here again.

She needed a touch up on her fairy and moon, and not quite on the spur of the moment (we'd been talking about getting together with her since the dave concert in mid-august), i met someone i'd like to introduce to you ... her name is nancy.

Nancy 3.5 hrs
click to enlarge


That is the dave matthews firedancer logo. although she looks all red, that is only because of the skin irritation. That picture was taken only 3 1/2 hours after the tattoo was put on, so it is still very raw. The color is actually a gradient, with red at the feet to Orange at the middle, ending with yellow at the hands. I had it put on my upper left shoulder, so that would be covered by a T-shirt. But, of course, when I go to Dave show, I will roll up the sleeve (maybe even pin it up). The image is shiny because I took it myself (shooting your left shoulder with your right hand is a bitch), and because it's covered in antibacterial ointment. I will post another picture when the color has had time to settle down.

No, I do not have plans for any more tattoos. Sue suggested I put Boyd's name below Nancy, because of course she knows that he is my hero, but I decided to pass on that. (anybody who can jump up and down on stage while playing a violin has got to be good.)

after the tattoo parlor, of course the next place we needed to go was the titty bar, where sue got so horny (and so drunk) she threw up.

So, there you go. That's what's up. Nothing, and everything, as always.

update: i've taken a bath and cleaned the blood and dead skin.

Nancy 3.5 hrs
click to enlarge




fullarm-thumbnail.jpg

click to enlarge

Friday, July 21, 2006

here comes the christiban

the christiban is at work again, attempting, through legislation, to decide what is right for you to view. now, they can't outright ban my work yet, but they are trying to make it extraordinarily difficult and dangerous.

that's right. dangerous.

Wednesday, July 19, 2006

another class down

econ 2306, microeconomics -- complete three weeks early, and i got a b. i'm ... flabbergasted, cuz i understand less about economics now than i did when i started.

Monday, July 17, 2006

my cocksucking dad

people wonder why i think my dad is an asshole. it's shit like this.

(12:54:47 PM) him: u there!
(12:54:53 PM) me: what.
(12:55:04 PM) him: need a call. office
(12:55:13 PM) me: i'm at the uta library.
(12:55:48 PM) me: your choices are instant message, email, or wait.

[pause]
[he calls my cell]

(1:12:40 PM) me: i told you i'm at the fucking library.

[pause]

(1:15:33 PM) him: I wasn't at my computer.
(1:15:51 PM) him: I have a couple of computer questions.
(1:16:00 PM) him: I'll try to remember them.
(1:16:06 PM) him: TTFN

---

first: call habib, not me, because i don't know shit about your motherfucking telephone system.

second: when you send me an im, don't demand that i call you and then walk away, because within the next ten motherfucking seconds i might respond.

third: i don't give a shit if it was your orgasm that created me. it was long ago and i've paid for your indiscretion with my mother many times over.

fourth: i have other shit to do than be disturbed by you while i'm at school, or at work, or asleep.

he's starting to act like doglady again.

Sunday, July 16, 2006

tommy can you hear me?

my step-mom says, "that's a horrible thing to say," but she doesn't live with him and doesn't need the defense of gallows humor. we've decided to rename our oldest son tommy.

watching him is frustrating at times. to say "he's off in his own little world" is an understatement. at four, he ought to know things like how to tell us his name, and when he needs to go to the bathroom, even if he doesn't always make it. he ought to be able to tell us that he wants something to drink, or that he's hungry. he ought to be interested in interacting with the other kids. he ought to, you know, talk.

he doesn't. and it's frustrating to watch. he sometimes seems like he knows when he needs to go to the bathroom, like, for example, when he urgently wants to go outside so he can drop his pants and take a dump on the patio.

and he doesn't talk. he'll respond to prompts sometimes, and he can identify some colors, but most of the time he'll just ignore us and go on either watching tv or playing with his crayons and fuzz.

i talked a little about his fuzz habit. he does the same thing with crayons too: he will run the fuzz or crayons through his fingers, to the exclusion of all else, for hours at a time. he ignores us. he ignores the twins. he ignores his need to pee and so he wets himself and the floor without a second thought. like all children he hates to go to bed, so he takes his fuzz with him.

he doesn't actually do anything with the fuzz. he doesn't color with the crayons. he just picks them up and lets them slip through his fingers, like you might with sand on the beach once or twice.

the school people tell us that he's making progress (except of course he's not because it's summer and they wouldn't let him into the summer program). the doctor tells us to take him to the place with the year wait to even get an appointment six months later.

so how can we not be frustrated? especially with people like my mother, who is rapidly descending into the realms of respect equal to my father, calling my children feral.

it is true that we don't take them out much. it is also true that taking out three children four and younger, none of whom are potty trained, and none of whom really have this sharing thing down yet, is, shall we say, a major pain in the ass. they actually do eat at the table and use utensils (usually), and for the most part they are obedient. but they are also toddlers, and there are three of them.

so if you want to take them out, come and get 'em. we'll even let you take the minivan.

Tuesday, July 11, 2006

some nerdly stuff

i've taken to using a speech recognition package to do data entry. I use it to do e-mail and now blog entries, and it works pretty well most of the time. Except, of course, when I mumble. That makes it difficult to use when I do not want other people to overhear what I had to say. So, like, when sue is in the other room am I and sexually harassing my replacement wife. That's the kind of thing you don't really want to talk about out loud very much.

In other useless nerd news, I have upgraded my server and will be migrating all of the blogs and e-mail over to the new one within the next few days. I have to figure out what will be the first things to move. How fun.

I suppose, of course, this means that I should get off my ass and go to school, even if the speech recognition package will not recognize "ass." (i've gotten "aunts," "ask," and "ash.")

why can't i write funny shit like julie?

[edited: as a stylistic decision i generally do not edit posts, and i don't comment on my own posts. but i've fixed the link tertia complained about. dragon naturally speaking.]

Sunday, July 9, 2006

ads by gooooooooogle

one wonders why i'm getting ads for an ocd treatment facility. what keyword is it thinking of?

Saturday, July 8, 2006

birthdays

two of them. yesterday. the twins are 3.

it doesn't seem that long, really. a lot has happened, and not all of it has been fun, but there we go. they're learning to talk, and benjamin, as always, remains made of rubber. ben is also getting the pee pee in the potty thing down, though we haven't started that with samantha.

ian isn't getting anywhere on that, really, mostly because he just doesn't care. he doesn't want to stop laying on the floor and playing with his fuzz. he will spend hours on the living room floor playing with stuffing pulled from a pillow -- pillow fuzz. hours. just running it through his fingers.

his mother is getting more and more frustrated with his behavior, and i can't really say i blame her. he doesn't talk much, and he doesn't talk spontaneously at all. he doesn't indicate what he wants -- if he gets hungry and we don't realize it's lunch time, he'll just starve.

other.

the server will be moving again in a few days, so you can expect some downtime. not like anybody really depends on my silly little blog being up, but whatever. i'm moving the server off my boss's pipe and back onto my own.

and i've added a little advertising over there on the right. maybe it'll help financially. but that sort of depends on actually having people read the site. considering how much traffic the place gets, you know.

school continues. today's project is catching up on the economics, which tertia promised she'd do for me but she seems to be in about the same place with my economics exam as she is with those cooter pics she promised me. somehow i'm not surprised, tertia is v coy about that stuff.

Monday, June 26, 2006

dirty pictures

my wife keeps putting pictures of her cooter on her blog. see?

i think cecily and tertia should follow suit.

really.

love em both.

well, i guess cecily can wait until she stops hurting. but tertia has no excuse.

Wednesday, June 21, 2006

tap tap tap ...

... as cecily commented once, in one i think i accidentally erased ... is this thing on?

so an update.

---

first, in the "calls you do not want to receive at 9:15am when you've been asleep for an hour and was up all night" department.

"i wanted to let you know that your mother checked herself into a psychiatric hospital."

so i have schlepped to san antonio to see what the hell is going on. and what the hell is going on is ... not a great deal.

i can not say too much because i do not want to discuss secrets that are not mine, but it would be appropriate to say that a large part of my mother's social life is based on a past that did not actually happen. she has been found out, and the results remain to be seen. some significant relationships in her life were based on this fabricated past. i, of course, have known for something like 15 years that it was all bullshit, but i said nothing because i saw nothing but pain to be gained by my doing so. her husband especially would have been devastated if he'd known.

her motivations can be described as unclear at best. she claims a disassociative disorder led her to flashbacks and dreams of the events that she didn't participated in, and after she got involved in the associated community of people, she realized that it hadn't happened, but by then she was in too deep.

the smarter thing to do might have been, perhaps, to pull away without discussing the real reasons. we've all lost touch with someone for any of a number of reasons, and doing so could have been done, i think. but whatever.

now someone has asked for proof of her participation, and of course it does not exist. this led to an episode of extreme depression and suicidal ideation, and so here we are.

---

my next task is to get her out of the hospital before they carry her out feet first with a sheet over her head. she is actually pretty lucid although hasn't discussed much about motivation and what-nows and so on.

the point of these hospitals is to get you off the ceiling and get you back into society after 3-5 days. but while you are there, it's unlikely that you're going to be an effective patient advocate for yourself. many of these people do not know up from down; one of them shits on her bedsheets and then pushes her soiled linen across the floor in huge piles, also stealing linens from other patients when she can. when i was in one of these places, there was one guy who was stark raving nuts; his only reason for staying was so that his insurance would maybe approve covering shock therapy. when he got it, he was a new man.

anyway, this place has some serious problems, aside from the woman pushing her shit-covered sheets around. (she also serinades the assembeled patients, staff, and visitors with horrendous renditions of "amazing grace," and her own tune, the words to which go something like, "racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist.")

first, let's talk about diet.

now, everybody complains about hospital food, and everybody has a right to. even so, a diabetic meal does not mean sending a breakfast danish and fruit cup to the ward with a "diabetic" sticker on it. the first day she was there she couldn't get anything at all to eat. the second day she got a hamburger patty and that was it. today, the third day, they let her out to go with the assembled crew to the cafeteria, where they were serving breaded fried chicken (had to pick the breading off, starch), rice (starch), mashed potatos (starch), and corn on the cob (starch).

okay, so if they don't starve her to death, they'll kill her with medication.

it is the responsbility of the nursing staff to follow the orders. so when the orders say you get one pill of blood pressure meds, you get one.

except the pharmacy didn't have one. call. they'll send. three hours later. call again. they're out, they'll get some from the grocery store down the street. never comes. next day, they send double the dose, plus double the dose of the other blood pressure med, plus a third blood pressure med she's not supposed to be on.

now remember that most people here don't know up from down. the night before the doctor had said to my mother that hers was the third complaint that day he'd gotten of a medication error. most of these people will swallow rat posion if you put it in front of them.

if she'd taken the bp meds like they handed them to her, it could very well have killed her.

christ. isn't america's profit-driven health care wonderful?

---

okay, other news.

---

i've recently taken to reading the adventures of dr. diana. diana york blaine phd is an instructor at the university of southern california. her aredently-feminist viewpoint is eloquently expressed on her blog. i, of course, am an evil misogynist, especially considering my work. just ask my wife. she'll tell you. so will tertia.

i originally found her blog after some news stories about some usc students going wacko over some nude pictures she's posted of herself. (i'll save you the work. i think she's a hottie.)

in time i may slap her with some trackbacks. what she says has merit and is worthy of discussion, but is not the be-all and end-all of what gender relations ought to be.

---

work.

work is on an upward slope. we've addressed some communications issues and i'm feeling better about my progress there. i'm still not billing the hours i want, but i don't feel like i'm operating in quite the same vacuum.

we may be doing a booth at the big convention in vegas. the one i went to last year. oh joy.

---

sex.

i want some. may have found myself a girlfriend, too.

---

sleep.

time for that.

Saturday, May 27, 2006

a great trade

"honey, i broke my blog's sidebar. so, if i give you a blowjob will you fix it?"

consider your problem solved.

Saturday, May 13, 2006

dr schoolmarm

dr schoolmarm is my (and my wife's) psychiatrist. it'd been almost a year since i've seen her and a lot has happened in that time, so i spent a couple minutes catching her up. school, work, family, the works.

but the more i think about what she said, the more disturbed i become.

"i have patients who spend 10 and 12 and 14 hours a day on your site, and it's runing their lives."

this is without asking what site, by the way.

okay so sex addiction is real, as its its close cousin porn addiction. i don't deny that for a second.

i do, however, take umbrage at the suggestion that i or my work is responsible for others' problems. i am no more responsible for someone's porn addiction than the local brewrey is responsible for alcoholism. (by the way, i live a 5 minute drive from the brewrey. cooking barley stinks.)

i'm of three minds.

one is to let it drop, get my meds and go on.

one is to confront her.

one is to just cancel my next appointment and get someone else.

for the first option, i don't like it much. i feel like i get enough judgemental bullshit from society in general i do not also need to pay $100 for a 15 minute med management visit to get more of it from dr schoolmarm.

on the other hand, i don't really feel like paying $400 an hour to confront her either. i shouldn't have to pay to correct a situation she created.

and of course finding someone else is a huge pain because there aren't a lot of psychiatrists around here, and dr schoolmarm is actually the best of them.

this is actually the best job i've ever had. i have a friendly, supportive if demanding boss. the people i work with are fun and intelligent. the product we create is intelligent, friendly, and respectful of what our models want. we pay way more than the going rate for modeling in the area we produce in. on occasion when a model has a change of heart, we take her material down and permit her to buy it back. and we shoot all girls -- there are only four shoots of men on the site, done as experiments, and we won't be doing more.

it also pays better -- way better -- than any job i've ever had. it feeds my family and keeps my lights on and pays my mortgage.

and that's where dr schoolmarm's, and everyone else's, arguments fall down: this is the job i've found that pays my bills, and it's legal to boot. until you pay my bills, take your moralizing elsewhere.

Monday, May 1, 2006

the decider

with apologies to the beatles.

Saturday, April 29, 2006

song of the day

k.p.
performed by the gas house gang
you should be aware that i really can't transcribe barbershop. instead, buy a copy and listen. the italics are the bass and baritone backing vocals.

----

when the great war started over there
over there
and we told the kaiser to beware
say a prayer
they sent me off to camp with all the fellas
wearing metal caps that look like small umbrellas
but when i hit pariee with my gun and my new duds
they sat me down in front of thirty million tons of spuds

kay pee
kay pee
this is surely not the life for me
for me
mademoiselle from armandier will have nothing more to fear
if they never put me near kay pee
kay pee

kay pee
kay pee
taters look like little zeppelins to me
you see
they say that war is rough but i'm sitting on my duff
and i've surely had enough kay pee
kay pee

kay pee
i came here patriotic
kay pee
been peelin' till i'm half neurotic
it ain't worth it on what they pay me
it's not for me
i just want to fight a hun but the spuds are never done
wish i never had begun kay pee
el em en oh pee

kay pee
kay pee
kay pee
oh gee
as i fight for freedom and democracy
i'm in the army now
i'm not behind a plow
but it's all the same somehow you see
you see
kay pee
kay pee
kay pee
it's bizarre to fight a war this way
gee i hope we win the thing some mademoiselle from armandier
par ley vous me outta here
send me home today hey!

Wednesday, April 19, 2006

this that and overwhelmed

i really should write more often. it might help. it might even help build traffic.

nah.

okay. tuesday april 10, i went to see ladysmith black mambazo. ladysmith, if you've been living under a rock since 1986, is a south african a capella group. they were made internationally famous on paul simon's 1986 album graceland. they sing about the hardship of south african life, and now about the freedom since the end apartheid and the holding of the first all-race elections in 1994.

definately worth a listen.

passover was the next night, and i got roped into leading the 20 minute version of the seder. it was, as you can imagine, really fast.

i don't really have a problem with a fast seder, but i have a problem with a fast seder when i lead it. it's not that it's meant to be slow, but let's face it: the story of the exodous from egypt, the giving of the 10 commandments at mt. saini, and 40 years of wandering in the desert, ending at the jews' arrival in the land of israel, is the central story of the religion.

the passover seder is the annual retelling of that story. the service has a lot of flexibility, and there are many ways to do it, but it felt to me like the way we did it on wednesday and thursday was about getting through it as quickly as we could.

allowances must be made for my three small children, who are unable to sit through a long production. even so, in the future i'd like to give some thought to actually telling the story. like, the entire story.

one of the major complaints is that people often spend a long time doing the first half, and then they get to the meal, and then they rush through the after-meal stuff so they can get home.

i would take an alternative approach, so if any of you are out there taking hints, here's your chance: do both nights, and invite the same people both nights, so you have the same crowd.

on the first night, do the first half, and quit after eating. on the second night, eat first, and then do the second half.

this gives you plenty of time to do both parts of the service without shortening what could be a beautiful, meaningful event.

school is drawing to a close and i'm glad of that. i may take one course over the semester. i guess i should get off my ass and decide, since registration opens in the morning.

cecily talked about wanting a honda element.

no, hon. you don't want an element. your credit report notwithstanding, an element is the wrong car.

elements are designed for the lithe, thin, strong college-age crowd who want to throw their shit in the back and go. although it says "five doors," those ... things ... behind the doors (bat wings?) are not doors.

for people who are old, decript, fat, and have children (like me), any vehicle in which there is even the slightest possibility that i might have to slide the driver's seat forward to mess with the rugrat is unacceptable. a single child is actually pretty portable (compared to, say, three). and i'm going to suggest that cecily and hubby will wind up taking rugrat out quite a bit as they go about their lives.

but rugrats come with crap. lots of crap. diaper bags, for one. diaper bags tend to contain, at a minimum, diapers, wipes, plastic baggies (for used diapers), a change of clothes for baby, one or more baby mres, at least a change of tops for mom and/or dad, burp rags, bibs if you use them, and assorted children's rattles, pacifiers, and other assorted attention-wasting devices.

if you schlep your child around much, you will of necessity also shelp your child's crap around. this means that, in addition to getting the child in and out of the car (and bending over the seat to buckle said child in, which takes some getting used to), you will also wind up getting the crap in and out. and while the child can not walk, chances are at least average you will also want to take a stroller, so you don't have to carry the child all the time.

rainbow's suggestion for the sight-seeing parent: strollers are not permitted in carlsbad cavern, but the ranger desk at the top of the mountain may have baby backpacks you can borrow. borrow them; they are actually rather comfortable for both wearer and wearee. do not attempt to hand-carry an infant through carlsbad caverns, even if you're taking the elevator down. it is a very bad idea.


all of this means you want a car that has at least four doors. like, real doors. full-sized doors.

and of course, with gas now at $3 a gallon, you want a hybrid, which the element most assuredly is not.



i'm sick and sleepy, and now i'm going home.

Monday, April 3, 2006

there are days

when it's just blah. and meaningless blah at that.

sue lost her job at that complete shithole a couple of weeks ago, and we've now gotten the cobra letter -- their crappy insurance is now over $1100/mo for us.

she's taken a $10/hr job for a temp agency now grading 7th grade math tests for the state of new mexico, but that doesn't really pay gas and a baby sitter. it's mostly to get her out of her funk or something.

so we're back to ... nothing. except this time we don't even have severance.

i'm getting really tired of cobra.

Tuesday, March 28, 2006

both infertiles can come back

hcg levels are down to the 70s today, so the pregnancy has failed. part of the game for us, but sue is relieved. i am disappointed but by no means crushed.

there's always tertia.

Friday, March 24, 2006

pregnancy update

hcg is ~250, according to what she heard from the nurse. so far, so good, but as any infertile knows, there's a long, long road from here.

is this good? well, it's not bad. unexpected perhaps, but not bad. we weren't wasting anything like cecily did, but considering that she has only one tube, and it's filled with scar tissue (and nothing happened for the 18 years after the surgeries that did it, also never wasting it with her previous husband or boyfriends before me) ... what was going to happen?

nothing, right?

yes, tertia. a million. actually, this would make a million and one. you're next.

Wednesday, March 22, 2006

with apologies

i can only offer my humblest apologies to all two infertiles left reading this blog now. the picture below was produced using no artificial colorings, flavorants, or pio injections. we even skipped the trigger shot. just good old fashioned umph.

pee on a stick

Tuesday, March 21, 2006

what not to say

got back from a weekend trip to west texas, where my mother's family celebrated her father's 80th birthday. we schlepped the kids out there and in general had a decent time.

i would, however, like to express something that i had to bite my tongue over.

she muttered something about ian dropping her daughter's electronic toy several times. i did not say what i thought.

i wanted to say something like: ian is autistic. i'm sorry he has fine- and gross-motor deficits, which causes him to have trouble holding things. and he's also got a speech delay, which causes him to be unable to say stuff like "i'm sorry." now, i'm not getting all upset at your little brat who keeps pestering me to count her stupid poker chips, telling me that they're pieces of carrot and she's a rabbit, while i'm busy talking to someone i haven't seen in five years. but obviously my child's deficiencies are repugnant to you, so next time we come out here i'll put him in the corner with a dunce cap and make him hold a sign that says tard warning - keep away. would that make you happy, bitch?

but i didn't. i kept it civil. but i was not sorry to see the backside of that woman.

Monday, March 6, 2006

yet another

today marks 12 years of continuous sobriety for me.

it's been a long time since i've been to a meeting, for a lot of reasons, mostly comfort. i skipped birthday night last year, contrary to my custom, and i didn't go at all today, also contrary to my custom. the last meeting i went to turned into a funeral for somebody in the group who'd died that day or the day before. where they needed to be i guess, but i hadn't been to that group in a decade and had never heard of the guy. it wasn't a terribly enlightening meeting, and it was a smoking group so i left in some pretty serious ocular pain.

in some ways i'd like to go back, because i frequently find comfort there. on the other hand, i've reached enough years where people sometimes look to me like i'm the goddamned oracle of bill. plus, given my militant anti-christian bent, i frequently find myself at odds with the jesus freaks in the group who are certain that the book outlines the one true path to sobriety and his name is geeezhus!

i meant to go when i went to vegas and san francisco, and simply didn't have the physical energy after 14 hours of stomping around the city. i have tried the online stuff, and got involved with the oiaa some years back. i gave up, since it all wound up being too political and about power and rules, not about sobriety. i'll admit to my part in the games, and i now have neither the time nor the energy. but i'll be thrilled to bleed on you nonetheless, if you ask.

"The folly of mistaking a paradox for a discovery, a metaphor for a proof, a torrent of verbiage for a spring of capital truths, and oneself for an oracle, is inborn in us."
-- Paul Valéry, 1895

(thanks to the usenet oracle for the quote.)

Tuesday, February 28, 2006

song of the day

all for you (acoustic version)
sister hazel

----
there's been times
i'm so confused
and on my roads
they lead to you
i just can't turn and walk away
you walk away

it's hard to say what it is i see in you
wonder if
i'll always bee with you
words can't say and i can't do enough to prove
'sall for you.

and finally i figured out
but it took a long long time
oh now as i turn about
maybe cause i'm trying

there's been times
i'm so confused
and on my roads
they lead to you
i just can't turn and walk away
you walk away

it's hard to say what it is i see in you
wonder
if i'll always bee with you
words can't say and i can't do enough to prove
'sall for you.

i thought i seen it all
cuz it's been a long long time
oh but a little trip and fall
wondering if i'm blind

there's been times
i'm so confused
and on my roads
well they lead to you
i just can't turn and walk away
you walk away

it's hard to say what it is i see in you
wonder
if i'll always bee with you
words can't say and i can't do enough to prove
'sall for you.

and rain comes pouring down
pouring down
falling from blue skies
falling from blue skies
oh words without a sound
are coming from your eyes

finally i figured out
but it took a long long time
oh now there's a turnabout
maybe cuz i'm trying

there's been times
i'm so confused
and on my roads
they lead to you
i just can't turn and walk away
you walk away

it's hard to say what it is i see in you
wonder
if i'll always bee with you
words can't say and i can't do enough to prove
'sall for you.

well it's hard to say what it is i see in you
wonder
if i'll always bee with you
words can't say and i can't do enough to prove
'sall for you.

no
it's hard to say
yeah
it's hard to say
it's all for you

Friday, February 24, 2006

comments

seemingly fixed.

Wednesday, February 22, 2006

today's search terms

there's only one worth mentioning:

the price of milk on february 18, 2004

what?

oh, there's a comment on my last post from christine. thank you, hon, even if wordpress doesn't show it. view the permalink to see it.

Monday, February 20, 2006

history exam 1 ... meow

history 2314 - history of england 2 (1688-present). exam 1 was totally bonkers, as usual with this guy. but he gave us the question in advance, and spent a day going over what he wanted.

his comments:

83: your essay's chief strength is the frequency of sharp insights into major trends or issues. well done! in many places, thought, such as wilkes and war in america, supporting specifics and more extensive discussion would strengthen is a solid essay.

of the 51 people who took the exam, i was one of the 37% that made a b; only the a's had it better at 41%.

so i sit in class now, listening to him read one of the best essays, while the ... uh ... challenged ... kid to my left hacks up a lung (does he smoke) and stares at the grain on his desk and claps and whispers to himself about spelling errors. i really should post the recording; it's ... irritating. yeah, really mean but his vision isn't good enough to read what i'm typing from where he's sitting.

-----

in part after a discussion over at the rabbit lived (where my comment was apparently deemed inflammatory and deleted, but this is my blog so i can write whatever the hell i want), i took kiri my 16yo to the vet for a $250 annual exam for "old cats." i suspect diabetes, so we'll see, because the exam doesn't include any treatment, just diagnostics. it does include stuff like a cbc and chem25, fiv and felv tests, but i'm already at $300 if i want to do vaccinations (i don't, she doesn't go outside or really have any contact with the other cats -- what's she gonna catch? dust bunnies?).

re the emergency vets, there are two in my area. both are wildly expensive, and one of them is renowned for its shady business practices and lack of care for the animals brought there.

in one case, apparently, an owner brought a yorkie in for an emergency c-section; supposedly all the puppies died but somehow some of the techs wound up with yorkie puppies. in another, a kennel owner brought a boarded dog in who was suffering some kind of bloating disorder. the vet not only refused to treat the dog without permission from the owner (who was out of the country and could not be reached) but also refused to release the dog back to the kennel owner! this dog apparently died in excruciating pain in the vet's office.

so all vets around here recommend that you go to the other.

the issue really is money. this expense for the cat, today, is something i've planned for and i'm prepared for, within reason. and in an urgent care situation i can usually swing an extra $150. but i don't have credit or a cash cushion, so the the thought of shelling out $500 or $1000 at an emergency vet -- for a cat who's pushing 17 -- when i have a host of other expenses to pay for, is a hard sell.

my wife believes in the poundage theory. she likes great danes, in part because they're big dogs. when you take the dog to the vet and you have a $300 vet bill, you can amortize the bill across the weight of the dog, so if you have a 100 pound dog, it only costs $3 a pound.

compare that to kiri. i'm looking at a vet bill something akin to $43 a pound.

that's pretty damned expensive for something that doesn't come out from doglady's bedroom unless i go in there and get her.

Sunday, February 12, 2006

islamic insanity

burning down embassies and attacking military bases is apparently an appropriate response to a newspaper cartoon.

and some people seem to believe that lack of tolorance and understanding is merely a western problem.

Monday, February 6, 2006

a little bit for now

it's 835am, and i'll shortly be going to class with the most annoying student in the history of the universe, whose name i'll not repeat lest his poor parents sue me for everything they think i might ever be worth.

but i thought i'd take some time, since the computer lab is right across the hall, to do a little update and tell you what's been going on. the answer: not a great deal.

had my annual physical not too long ago. mid-january sometime. i'm healthy. except that it looks likely i have diabetes. this is no surprise, really: i eat like shit, am overweight and gaining (my bmi is 29.2), and i have a family history of diabetes. so, back in two and a half months or so for repeat testing. he wants me to lose twelve pounds by then. i literally fell out of my chair laughing.

school is interesting but there are no available cute girls to talk to this semester. i'm doing history 2314, better known as history of england 2, and interdisciplinary 2301, better known as interdisciplinary perspectives.

the interdisciplinary course is an introduction to interdisciplinarity (how's that for a word?). it teaches the fundamental concepts for interdisciplinary work, and caps it off with a research paper about a, complex problem (the sort you'd study using interdisciplinary methodology): global warming.

for now we're still going through the disciplines, but i'm enjoying the course immensely and really like the flaming-liberal instructor.

i know there's a new wordpress release but i haven't had time to look at it. i'm sure i'll get around to installing it, but not this week.

work continues. a major project we're doing is finally looking like it's almost ready to roll. i now have to write supporting documentation and web pages for everything, get all the docs in order, do mailing, all that garbage. i've been wanting to work on this project for a long time, and i'm finally getting somewhere with it, it feels like. we may be ready to roll by april, instead of the may we'd originally announced.

my wife has found and started her new job. she's doing the same thing, only this time, she's been outsourced. so she makes less money, gets fewer benefits, works with dumber people making less money getting even crappier benefits than she does, and still does the same job. ah, the american way. the only upside is that we haven't had to move to india.

i need to get laid. maybe my replacement wife will let me rub some butt paste on her burning cooter.

Friday, February 3, 2006

me

i promise i'm still alive. will have an update "shortly."

he said to derisive laughter from the now-empty audience..

Thursday, January 5, 2006

las vegas - day 1

i get to the airport at the ever-so-cheerful time of 0745. for someone who believes that god did not mean for humans to get up before the crack of noon, this is no mean feat.

once at the airport, i checked in and jiggered my way through security. at the airline, i checked in and lo and behold, the plane was full. so full they offered $500 and a flight four hours later for those willing to take a bump. so i took the bump and cooled my heels.

my bags stayed on the america west flight, and i was instructed to go to the america west baggage office to claim them later.

the bump put me on an american flight, also direct to vegas. after enduring three sardine-like hours packed into a penis-shaped flying can, i arrived in las vegas.

now.

i'd been warned that there are slot machines in the airport. it didn't really surprise me that there are metric assloads of them. and of course there are the signs for every performance known to man: manilow, penn & teller, carrot top, three different cirque shows at three different venues, and on and on and on.

i get to the baggage claim and lo and behold, my bags are not there. after an hour standing in line at the america west baggage office where i file my claim and they promise to deliver my bags to the hotel, i make a pit stop at the atm, which kindly dispenses a $100 bill, and i finally get over to the taxi stand.

where i wait for an hour. for a fucking taxi.

now, let me explain. this is not a city without taxis, like fort worth, where i live. in fort worth, you call a taxi and wait an hour. the taxi shows up, and you're off to your destination. the taxis come to the taxi stand in groups of 19, where the airport employee has obligingly lined you up ready for the taxi when it arrives. all well and good, and it would be accurate to say that the line did move pretty much continuously.

it was just a fucking mile long.

a 15 minute taxi ride helped me discover something else: i'd put my $500 travel voucher in the envelope used for my boarding pass. which had my claim check sticker stuck on it. which i'd handed to the guy in the baggage office so he could handle my claim.

he kept it. my voucher was gone. they don't replace them. ever. even if you're jesus motherfucking christ and need a flight.

i get to the hotel but the cabbie can't break a $100. so i have to rush into the hotel, where i stop at the concierge desk (no luck), the front desk (no luck) and finally the casino cage (where they want to hand me chips, not cash). when i get back outside where the cabbie is waiting, he's ... gone. i wait for about 10 minutes and go back inside.

as i'm in line, my cabbie shows up and wants his money, which i happy give to him, along with an inordinantly large tip for the hassle.

i try to check in. it takes almost a half hour.

it turns out that my boss had booked me for a king-sized bed, great for when i have the hooker up here. but they've blocked all the king-sized beds so that the desk people can't assign them, because ordinarily people come in who've booked a double and ask for an upgrade, and the desk people give it to them. but since this is the biggest convention of the year in vegas, everybody is packed to the gills, and so they've blocked the kings for people who've actually reserved them, so that they're not given away to people who'd only booked a pair of doubles. fair enough, except that they have to take my driver's license into the office and have the manager handle it manually, instead of being able for the desk people to go, oh, a guest who reserved a king, and have the system spit out a king-sized bed. noooo. so. standing there. listening to the elvis impersonator sing while dealing blackjack.

what about my laptop? oh you can check it at the cage if you need to, since of course you don't want to leave it in your room.

no, at the cage the boxes are designed for money and jewelry, and so are about 5 inches wide, not enough to hold my 10 lb laptop. it takes five inquiries over five hours to find the correct answer to my problem: check my shit at the bell stand. so tomorrow i don't have to schlep my laptop all over the convention center.

it's 4pm, and i want to get my convention badge. so i try to find my way to the sands expo center. oh, just down the block according to the map i picked up wandering around looking for the way to the sands expo center.

everything is close in vegas, but everything is so large that you either take a shuttle or you take a cab anywhere you want to go. walking is insane, especially when you had foot surgery recently enough that you're still not feeling 100%. i, however, being inexperienced in the ways of vegas, do not know this, and walk about two miles to the sands expo from the imperial palace.

when i get to the registration desk, after another 20 minutes of wandering around, they have closed. 15 minutes early. i have just wasted a two-mile walk (schlepping my laptop, since i had not yet discovered the truth of the bell stand). the woman observes, ever so helpfully, at at least tomorrow i'll know where the desk is. she's lucky she didn't lose her teeth.

but at the sands expo center, i manage to find a shuttle back to the hotel. except it doesn't go to my hotel, it goes to the two hotels on either side. so more walking.

i get back to my room and finally hook up with the cohort from california, and we have a nice $85 steak dinner (that, in any other restaurant, would cost no more than $40).

all in all, a fucking disaster.

onward tomorrow.

Sunday, January 1, 2006

wordpress upgrade

wordpress has released version 2.0. it's free. it's fast. upgrading from previous versions of wordpress is easy if you pay attention to the directions. and it's running here.